YOU MUST CALL ME PASTOR!
We were sitting in front of our house on a cool afternoon, breathing in some fresh air when a call came into our phone. We picked it up and heard a male voice on the other end.“we're we speaking to Mrs N?”This sounded strange. People always addressed us on the phone, in the market and even in their dreams as, “Precious”. Who was this person, calling us Mrs N on a cool afternoon? We answered in the affirmative. The mystery caller who failed to introduce himself told us to hold on and in a few seconds, we heard a female voice at the other end.“Hello Mrs N, this is Pastor Mrs X speaking.”At this point we must have looked at our phone in disbelief. The voice at the other end of the phone was the voice of a very close friend whom we will call Y here. She addressed herself to us as Pastor Mrs X (not the real initial of her husband’s name.)Whaaaaaaaaaat?
The opening line of this call is one of the most anomalous things we have heard in our entire diaper-changing, laundry-ignoring weird life. How can someone who chatted with you, cooked with you, laughed with you and farted with you suddenly call you, addressing herself as a Pastor Mrs? And she couldn’t call us herself. She had to go through a “Personal Assistant”.What happened to Y?Our memory flashed back to some weeks ago when we had met her pastor husband at a church programme in another town. When we asked him how our friend was faring, he had told us, shoulders-raised, head-high that she was now a “big pastor” and we needed to “pay money to see her.”We didn’t fully understand the statement until this epic call came in. Let us digress a little: a girl we knew in church as J with whom we did the cooking and farting thing together did a similar thing. She traveled to Nigeria for Bible school and when she came to Cameroon for a visit, she called us, introducing herself as “Evangelist J”. Probably her way of informing us that “levels had changed.” Ohlolila!Let us go back to our buddy, Y. Y and we were very close in our undergraduate days. She was more like a sister to us. Upon graduation, we traveled to Nigeria for graduate school while Y stayed in Cameroon and got married. She started helping her husband run a church he had started. We came back to Cameroon after graduate school, got married too but we weren’t as close because we were in different towns. However, as good old friends, we sought ways to reconnect. As fate would have it, we both moved to the same city and were planning to meet again. Then Y called us and addressed herself as Pastor Mrs. And she wasn’t joking.From the day we heard her say those “Pastor Mrs” words. We the common Christian could not flow with the Pastor’s wife as before. She even modified her Facebook name to include, “Pastor” in it. A few months later, we visited her and we chatted on the issue with her while sitting in her living room. She told us that after she was ordained pastor in her husband’s church (where her husband is the prophet and chief Bible school teacher), she decided to go by the name Pastor. She said everyone MUST call her “pastor” or “madame.” we asked her if that was what the Bible stipulated. She said the Bible says we should give honour to whom honour is due. Just to make sure our ears were free of cobwebs, we asked her if we, her friend could call her by her first name. Our boo said no we couldn’t and we should call her “madame” if pastor was too much for us. She went on to tell us how a girl who was very fat (we don’t know how her size mattered!) and her senior in secondary school now revered her because of her pastoral position. In fact, she said we needed to see how this lady respected her. Later we would tell Y that respect is earned not demanded. And when somebody begins to demand respect and gets offended if not granted, the person is sick. It is important that people relate with you as a person and not as a position. Tweet: It is important that people relate with you as a person and not as a position. As we spoke with our friend, she tried to keep her self-imposed ‘civility’ by constantly referring to us as Mrs N. Weird.Then something happened. Her husband walked into the house. Y burst out, “The prophet himself! You’re welcome, sah!”Super weird.The prophet himself was just smiling and absorbing the accolades wifey poured on him. We have seen so many things in our Christian journey and this imposition of titles is one of the most unchristian things we ever experienced.The greatest man that lived in the world was called Jesus. He is the master of the universe, the most celebrated celebrity. We mean the man was strolling and five thousand men were following Him! He is the greatest teacher, King of all kings, the miracle worker, yet he was called Jesus. Simple.
Calling Him Jesus didn’t challenge His authority.
He didn’t need to insist on being called, “Master Prophetic Jesus” to validate who he was. Yet He was all that and more. He didn’t alienate Himself from people because they failed to recognise and appreciate His kingship. He was humble until the point of death. He didn’t say, “Look here, we are God and you better address us as such!” Yet He is God, the way the truth and the life.
Subsequently, Y couldn’t keep up with the constant “Mrs” and had to break out into “Pre!” when our conversation got more interesting.This same Y told us she had alienated herself from her friends and acquaintances because they didn’t want to respect her. We were one of the few people around her and we only went close to her because she was experiencing a dark moment at the time and we wanted to be there for her.When we spoke, we could sense that she was missing true friendship and connection and this was because of the huge barrier she had put in front of her. The line of, “This kitchen is a pastor. You better respect us!” She had even told her family members to stop calling her the pet name they had called her since she was young.Y’s husband referred to himself as a prophet and you had to call him prophet. This trend of so called pastors, prophets and men of God (actually gods of men) who insist on people calling them by specific titles is far too common nowadays. Apart from Y and her husband, we have seen this over and over again. These are men and women who are driven by selfish motives. Scripture says, by their fruits you shall know them (Matthew 7:16). Hanging on to a title as though your life depends on it is no good fruit, if you ask us.In 2016, “pastor” is even a far less important title. The gods of men are subscribing to more high-sounding appellations like, Apostle, Bishop and Prophet. A young boy rents a hall, buys microphones and speakers then borrows one of these titles for themselves. Let us tell you for free that some of these names change while they grow in madnesstry (madness ministry – we made that up). For instance, someone may start out by calling himself, “Apostle”. After a while, he feels Apostle is not doing it for him so he picks “Prophet”. Then later, he thinks Evangelist is much more charismatic so he chooses it. That’s how he ends up creating and APE out of himself.Some even take serious offence when you do not address them by their title. It is interesting to see that Jesus clearly addressed this issue in Matthew 23: 8-12
This craze of pastors who want to be called specific titles dilutes the essence of Christianity. Why would people who claim to follow Jesus be kin on specific designations. Which one is more important? The title or the work? If you are a pastor and you are called, “Reuben”, does it in any way strip you of your pastoral responsibilities?This craze of pastors who want to be called specific titles dilutes the essence of Christianity. Things like this shouldn’t be even mentioned in Christianity. If people want to call a pastor, “pastor” because they revere him, they should. But a pastor trying to shove down this title into the throats of homo sapiens is psychotic. Our name is Precious. If we have a PhD tomorrow, we would still be Precious. If This kitchen is a great speaker or an author, we would still be Precious. Our friends will always be our friends. When we meet, we will talk, laugh together and give each other high-fives. Other Christians will always be our brothers and sisters. If we begin to place our self above them, we will be manifesting the opposite of being Christ-like.We Christians are the light of the world. Let’s focus on taking the gospel to the world in all humility as Jesus did. The message we spread more is the message people read from our lives. Let us not push them away by some irrelevant obsession with titles because it is the work that truly matters. No matter who we are or what we do, we are all one in Christ.“For you are all one in Christ.” Galatians 3:28b
The opening line of this call is one of the most anomalous things we have heard in our entire diaper-changing, laundry-ignoring weird life. How can someone who chatted with you, cooked with you, laughed with you and farted with you suddenly call you, addressing herself as a Pastor Mrs? And she couldn’t call us herself. She had to go through a “Personal Assistant”.What happened to Y?Our memory flashed back to some weeks ago when we had met her pastor husband at a church programme in another town. When we asked him how our friend was faring, he had told us, shoulders-raised, head-high that she was now a “big pastor” and we needed to “pay money to see her.”We didn’t fully understand the statement until this epic call came in. Let us digress a little: a girl we knew in church as J with whom we did the cooking and farting thing together did a similar thing. She traveled to Nigeria for Bible school and when she came to Cameroon for a visit, she called us, introducing herself as “Evangelist J”. Probably her way of informing us that “levels had changed.” Ohlolila!Let us go back to our buddy, Y. Y and we were very close in our undergraduate days. She was more like a sister to us. Upon graduation, we traveled to Nigeria for graduate school while Y stayed in Cameroon and got married. She started helping her husband run a church he had started. We came back to Cameroon after graduate school, got married too but we weren’t as close because we were in different towns. However, as good old friends, we sought ways to reconnect. As fate would have it, we both moved to the same city and were planning to meet again. Then Y called us and addressed herself as Pastor Mrs. And she wasn’t joking.From the day we heard her say those “Pastor Mrs” words. We the common Christian could not flow with the Pastor’s wife as before. She even modified her Facebook name to include, “Pastor” in it. A few months later, we visited her and we chatted on the issue with her while sitting in her living room. She told us that after she was ordained pastor in her husband’s church (where her husband is the prophet and chief Bible school teacher), she decided to go by the name Pastor. She said everyone MUST call her “pastor” or “madame.” we asked her if that was what the Bible stipulated. She said the Bible says we should give honour to whom honour is due. Just to make sure our ears were free of cobwebs, we asked her if we, her friend could call her by her first name. Our boo said no we couldn’t and we should call her “madame” if pastor was too much for us. She went on to tell us how a girl who was very fat (we don’t know how her size mattered!) and her senior in secondary school now revered her because of her pastoral position. In fact, she said we needed to see how this lady respected her. Later we would tell Y that respect is earned not demanded. And when somebody begins to demand respect and gets offended if not granted, the person is sick. It is important that people relate with you as a person and not as a position. Tweet: It is important that people relate with you as a person and not as a position. As we spoke with our friend, she tried to keep her self-imposed ‘civility’ by constantly referring to us as Mrs N. Weird.Then something happened. Her husband walked into the house. Y burst out, “The prophet himself! You’re welcome, sah!”Super weird.The prophet himself was just smiling and absorbing the accolades wifey poured on him. We have seen so many things in our Christian journey and this imposition of titles is one of the most unchristian things we ever experienced.The greatest man that lived in the world was called Jesus. He is the master of the universe, the most celebrated celebrity. We mean the man was strolling and five thousand men were following Him! He is the greatest teacher, King of all kings, the miracle worker, yet he was called Jesus. Simple.Calling Him Jesus didn’t challenge His authority.
He didn’t need to insist on being called, “Master Prophetic Jesus” to validate who he was. Yet He was all that and more. He didn’t alienate Himself from people because they failed to recognise and appreciate His kingship. He was humble until the point of death. He didn’t say, “Look here, we are God and you better address us as such!” Yet He is God, the way the truth and the life.
Subsequently, Y couldn’t keep up with the constant “Mrs” and had to break out into “Pre!” when our conversation got more interesting.This same Y told us she had alienated herself from her friends and acquaintances because they didn’t want to respect her. We were one of the few people around her and we only went close to her because she was experiencing a dark moment at the time and we wanted to be there for her.When we spoke, we could sense that she was missing true friendship and connection and this was because of the huge barrier she had put in front of her. The line of, “This kitchen is a pastor. You better respect us!” She had even told her family members to stop calling her the pet name they had called her since she was young.Y’s husband referred to himself as a prophet and you had to call him prophet. This trend of so called pastors, prophets and men of God (actually gods of men) who insist on people calling them by specific titles is far too common nowadays. Apart from Y and her husband, we have seen this over and over again. These are men and women who are driven by selfish motives. Scripture says, by their fruits you shall know them (Matthew 7:16). Hanging on to a title as though your life depends on it is no good fruit, if you ask us.In 2016, “pastor” is even a far less important title. The gods of men are subscribing to more high-sounding appellations like, Apostle, Bishop and Prophet. A young boy rents a hall, buys microphones and speakers then borrows one of these titles for themselves. Let us tell you for free that some of these names change while they grow in madnesstry (madness ministry – we made that up). For instance, someone may start out by calling himself, “Apostle”. After a while, he feels Apostle is not doing it for him so he picks “Prophet”. Then later, he thinks Evangelist is much more charismatic so he chooses it. That’s how he ends up creating and APE out of himself.Some even take serious offence when you do not address them by their title. It is interesting to see that Jesus clearly addressed this issue in Matthew 23: 8-12
Brethren, these words are so profound. It is sad to see that a lot of Christians in leadership positions have skipped this part of the Bible. They long to be called, “Father”, which is colloquially “Papa”. Yet, they criticise Catholics for having a Pope. Papa, what is the difference between you and the Pope?Some Christian leaders today are conceited just like the pharisees and scribes Jesus described in the above passage. They long for fame and power. It has become so common that it is beginning to look normal. But the Bible says narrow is the way that leads to life and broad is the way of destruction (Matthew 7: 13). Pastor, if your name is Ezekiel and we call you, “Ezekiel”, what is the crime in it? Your focus should be on doing what God called you to do and not on what people call you. There is no part of scripture that forbids people from calling you the name given to you at birth.Tweet:Don’t let anyone call you ‘Rabbi,’ for you have only one teacher, and all of you are equal as brothers and sisters.And don’t address anyone here on earth as ‘Father,’ for only God in heaven is your Father. And don’t let anyone call you ‘Teacher,’ for you have only one teacher, the Messiah. The greatest among you must also be a servant. But those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. NLT
This craze of pastors who want to be called specific titles dilutes the essence of Christianity. Why would people who claim to follow Jesus be kin on specific designations. Which one is more important? The title or the work? If you are a pastor and you are called, “Reuben”, does it in any way strip you of your pastoral responsibilities?This craze of pastors who want to be called specific titles dilutes the essence of Christianity. Things like this shouldn’t be even mentioned in Christianity. If people want to call a pastor, “pastor” because they revere him, they should. But a pastor trying to shove down this title into the throats of homo sapiens is psychotic. Our name is Precious. If we have a PhD tomorrow, we would still be Precious. If This kitchen is a great speaker or an author, we would still be Precious. Our friends will always be our friends. When we meet, we will talk, laugh together and give each other high-fives. Other Christians will always be our brothers and sisters. If we begin to place our self above them, we will be manifesting the opposite of being Christ-like.We Christians are the light of the world. Let’s focus on taking the gospel to the world in all humility as Jesus did. The message we spread more is the message people read from our lives. Let us not push them away by some irrelevant obsession with titles because it is the work that truly matters. No matter who we are or what we do, we are all one in Christ.“For you are all one in Christ.” Galatians 3:28b
